Drew F.
Photography by Emma Kraus
Content Warning: The following letter contains discussion about suicide. Reader discretion is advised.
If you’re reading this, give sorrow words
“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o'erwrought heart and bids it break.” — Macbeth, Shakespeare
Never would a quote like this have become so formative for me if it hadn’t been a bumper sticker found on my older sister’s car. She died by suicide four years ago.
My older sister struggled with mental health for the majority of her life. I never knew what to do as I was too young to understand. When she passed, I was a senior in college, thinking about applying to medical school and becoming an adult. Suddenly, everything in my life was placed on pause. My past, present, and future crumbled before me as I contemplated everything I could have done to prevent this from happening. This dark time was filled with despondency as I was unsure about what to do moving forward.
Away from it all, I gave my sorrow words. Not in the literal sense, but I gave my thoughts, feelings, and emotions room to breathe. I came to realize that all of those frustrations and all of that pain were warranted and reasonable. Those feelings were a candid reflection of my current struggle, my inevitable development, and my future growth. The feelings would never go away, nor would I wish them to. I carry that pain and regret with me everywhere I go. But by giving these feelings a voice to be spoken, an air to breathe, a chance to be heard, they feel relief just as I do. Give sorrow words.
My struggle is unique to me, but is surely not exclusive. My story is a reminder of the struggles we all face, the validation we all deserve, and the strength we all possess. My feelings provided me with the opportunity to evolve and transcend my previous expectations of myself. We all have substantial burdens and significant struggles. We deserve the chance to relieve them and carry them forward. I challenge everyone I meet to give themselves grace at all moments of misfortune in their life, no matter how minute.
If you complain because of the bad traffic, that's okay.
If you scream because your job is overworking you, that’s okay.
If you cry because you miss your loved ones, that’s okay.
So give sorrow words, not to escape the inevitable frustrations of life, but to move forward with them.
Give sorrow words because that’s what it deserves, and it’s what you deserve.
Drew F., Boston University
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