Jackson K.
Photo provided by Jackson K.
If you’re reading this, you have everything you need already inside of you.
Imposter syndrome is almost inevitable in life, especially for those who are pursuing medicine. It often never leaves our side, even when we survive the admissions process and make it to medical school. The journey to medical school is grueling to say the least, and it brews a complex in many people (like me) where we are constantly questioning our self-worth and ability to achieve our dreams. And for many, these feelings of inadequacy lead them to giving up on their dreams. I would not be surprised if most people reading this have had at least one moment in their journey to medicine where they were left thinking “Do I have what it takes?” or “What should by plan B be?” I will swallow my pride and admit that I have thought this to myself … all the time. However, I am here to tell you that the worst thing you can do is sell yourself short by saying you can’t do something. Or shouldn’t. Or won’t be able to. We as medical students are known for being our own worst critics, but we need to learn how to also be our biggest advocates and supporters. We have all been taught to think that success in medical school comes from academic accolades and beating at our flaws until perfection arises, but success in medical school also comes from standing firm in our sense of self and being able to celebrate our strengths in a field where we are bred to dissect our flaws. But if we were to shift the way that we self-appraise, especially against those standing next to us, the next generation of physicians would not only have the academic foundation but also the mental fortitude to weather the profession that awaits us.
A lot of my insecurities have stemmed from feelings of inadequacy, constantly worrying that I do not have what it takes or that I won’t be able to match others’ expectations of myself. I had always questioned if I held the tools to success in my toolbox, which often left me second guessing my choices and being left with “paralysis by analysis”. But my college yoga instructor had a mantra that helped shift my self-perception: you have everything you need already inside of you. This was something that she would always say as we built up to attempt a difficult pose, reminding us that we can do hard things. And while this was a small and seemingly inconsequential phrase, it has radically changed my self-image. Since hearing this phrase for the first time, I have repeated it back to myself whenever I needed a reminder of my strength and capabilities: when on the back of a runway as a collegiate pole vaulter, sitting down to take the MCAT, or even as I sat down recently to take a mock board exam. So, as you read this, I want you to do the same: take a moment to stop, smell the roses, and remind yourself of how strong and capable you are. You did not make it to where you are today by sheer luck. You got here through determination, perseverance, and grit. And you will get through tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that because everything you need to succeed is already inside of you.
Jackson K., Second Year Medical Student
Q: How do you manage the stress of preclinical training, such as learning high volumes of detailed information and increased levels of competition?
A: One I do to manage the stress is by bookmarking the start and end of my days with things that energize me in the morning and ground me every night. This will look different for everyone but for me this is exercising and reading/crocheting in the morning and at night, respectively. Find what fills your cup and helps to give you that serotonin boost, whether it be cooking a good meal, watching a show or movie, or sitting on the phone or facetime with a friend or family. It is easier said than done, but I cannot emphasize enough the importance of taking time to “touch the grass” every day.
Arguably the most important thing I do is take a second every day to find something I am proud of. Whether it be getting through an extra lecture that day, doing better than expected on a practice test, or simply getting myself to study, it is important that we celebrate our wins no matter how small. The society we live in has plagued us to think that we should only feel proud upon big milestones like graduating college or getting into medical school, but I think we should also start to find reasons to be proud on a day-to-day basis. So just take a moment to be proud of yourself for spending another day pursuing your dreams. Do it now as you read this letter, find one reason to be proud of yourself. Even if you didn’t make it 500 miles closer to your dreams, be proud of making it even a centimeter.
Q: What is your most used coping strategy or technique?
A: Well, not so much a strategy but a motto (or two). I think that affirmations can be a strong coping technique, helping to ground us in times of instability and uncertainty. My grandfather taught us many good phrases growing up, but two have always been my constant reminder: gambatte and plan the work, work the plan. The first phrase is a Japanese phrase that can mean “do your best” or “keep up the good work”, and the former was a phrase that my Ojiichan and father would say whenever approaching a big test, presentation, or milestone. These phrases help me overcome the worries of everyday life, reminding me to step back from my hyper-fixation on the small details in order to see the big picture.
I also cope with major stressors by doing power poses. It may seem juvenile, but this is a great way to ground myself and inject a little bit of confidence back into me if I’ve let it slip away. So the next time you encounter a major stressor, whether it be a test, interview, or difficult day at work, take a moment to yourself to try it. The worst thing that could happen is that it does not work for you. But that is the beauty of life. We all have different responses to stress, so that means we will all have different ways to cope with it.
Q: What advice would you give your younger self regarding coping and mental wellness?
A: Very bluntly put, I would tell my younger self “No one is hyper-fixated on all your flaws, despite what you think. And if they are, they have better things to do.” I am unfortunately an over-analyzer, and this made me spend a lot of my day-to-day life overthinking every little thing I do. This followed me into medical school, where I was constantly comparing myself against those around me. But a big shift in my mental health and approach to school this past year has stemmed from finally believing that the people around me are not constantly hyper-anazlying me like I always convinced myself, thanks to a strong support system that is comfortable bringing me back down to Earth when I need it.
Q: In what ways do you think medical schools can better support students' mental health and well-being?
A: Simply put, medical schools could better support their students by acting in a way that proves they value the mental health of the next generator of physicians. This does not mean moving mountains to support your students, it could even be as small as taking the concerns and well-being of students into account when making decisions to ensure that students are involved in every step of their education. It is one thing to state that you support and value mental health, but that statement does not hold much merit if you are not working to truly listen to and support students.
Several studies have revealed that medical students, physicians, and healthcare professionals experience mental health symptoms at rates significantly higher than the general population. Stethos[Cope] is a chapter of IfYoureReadingThis designed to help medical students and professionals cope with the unique stressors of medical training and change the narrative of mental health in medicine.
To read more letters and interviews from students, and to learn more about mental health in the medical community, visit the Stethos[Cope] home page.