Maiara L.
Photography by Peyton Mears
If you’re reading this, it’s okay to feel alone.
Coming into college, I was so excited for all the new opportunities and experiences I was finally going to get. I always heard of people looking back fondly on their times in college and how they formed their best relationships there. I would see all the Instagram posts and Tiktoks of these big friend groups, fun nights out, big parties, and cool hangouts with people. My hopes were high that I would finally get to experience something similar. But, I found that this isn’t always the case.
Of course, everyone is going to post the best moments of the night and being with friends. We want to show others the best versions of ourselves, but we have to remember that it’s not always the full truth. My first semester of college, I never really did find my “group” and I felt like I was floating between friends, just trying to pass the time and feel included. I started to become more upset about how even though I was putting myself out there and speaking to new people, I hadn’t found MY people yet. I felt like I was behind and missing out. I blamed myself a lot and started criticizing myself on my weak points. It was a bad mindset to have.
Missed connections aren’t a reflection of yourself, it’s just redirection. I had to learn that over time and eventually, I did find people I enjoyed being around and felt like I was finally a part of something. I don’t think loneliness in college is talked about a lot because everyone just assumes they have someone and everyone’s too caught up in their own lives to really think otherwise.
It can be so draining mentally and emotionally to feel like you don’t have anyone in your life. Especially, when you’re starting a brand new chapter of your life in a completely different place, away from anyone you know. But, I’m glad I got to learn from that chapter of my life. Your experiences are going to be different from everyone else’s and it’s important that you give yourself the time and grace to grow.
Change is scary. Being alone is scary. But it won’t be that way forever. It may feel like you’re stuck in a rut and there isn’t a bright-side in sight. But there’s no way to know what will happen tomorrow. Maybe you’ll bump into someone when you’re grabbing coffee and end up becoming best friends. Maybe your physics lab group ends up becoming your friend group. So, give yourself the time to grow into yourself, these new chapters of your life. The time to let it happen because there is still so much time in the future. This is only a small part of your life and one day you’ll look back and realize why it was necessary.
Maiara L., Florida State University
Connect With Us
To follow IfYoureReadingThis at FSU on Instagram, get in touch with our chapter, and learn about more resources available to FSU students, visit our chapter’s homepage.
AUTHOR CONTACT
This author has opted to allow readers who resonate with their story to contact them. If you would like to speak to the author of this letter about their experience, please use the form below.
